Noted Judge = He put up our dog.
Respected Judge = He put up our dog twice.
Esteemed Judge = He puts up anything that crawls.
Shown Sparingly = Only when we had it in the bag.
Show Prospect = He has 4 legs, 2 eyes, 2 ears, 1 tail.
Finished in 5 shows = And 89 where he failed to win a ribbon.
He has good points = His head is shaped like a carrot.
Won in heavy competition = The others were revoltingly overweight.
Multiple group winner = At 2 puppy matches.
Specialty Judge = Puts up anything that looks like his own breeding.
Well Balanced = Straight as a stick, front and rear.
Quiet gentle natured = After 4 valiums.
Excels in type and style = However, moves like a spider on speed.
Personality Plus = Wakes up if you put liver up his nose.
Large boned = Looks like a Clydesdale.
Good bite = Missed the judge, got the steward.
Lovely head = 2 eyes, 2 ears, 1 mouth, 1 nose.
Excels in movement = If he gets loose, put on your running shoes.
Gorgeous Stiff Coat = If the hairspray lasts until the class finishes.
Handled brilliantly by = Nobody else can get near him.
Won in stiff competition = Beat 4 puppies and a 9 year old novice dog.
At stud to "approved" bitches = Those bitches whose owner's check is "approved" by our bank.
Linebred from famous champions = CH. Whoozitz appears twice in 6th generation.
Good Obedience prospect = Smart enough to come in from the rain but he's UGLYYYYYY.
Terrific brood bitch = Her conformation is the pits, but she throws big litters.
Great stud dog = Mounts anything that can fog a mirror.
Loves children = For breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Wins another Best In Show = His second, under the same judge, our uncle.